Hi, I'm Cristina Marie
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About Me
My Younger Years
I was born with an imagination that was bigger than all of the stars and planets combined.
And thank goodness I did. It was that imagination that kept me dreaming and aspiring. It was this imagination that pushed my to do bigger and better with each day, month, year that passed by.
I started singing and acting on stages before I could even read (yes, I am still very much a theater nerd). Having such a vivid imagination helped me fully embrace each character that I played. It was as if I actually was them during the time I played them. I took attributes from each character and applied it to my own personality. The brains and wit of Brigitta from the Sound of Music, the strength and courage of Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz.
Growing up, my family lived about an hour away from my school. A lot of time was spent in the car, where I would listen to hours of music.
Since all of my friends lived close to the school, my weekends were spent mostly at home, alone – in my room. But it was there where I would sing at the top of my lungs and pretend that I was on some of the biggest stages in the world.
Being on stage was the only version of me that I felt like I could fully embrace. It was the only side of me that I felt like people around me accepted. So when I wasn’t on stage, I was a “chameleon” – I was whatever everyone else around me was at the time.
I held onto singing and acting as my escape through childhood and into high school. I even got a scholarship to study vocal performance in college.
Except something crazy was happening inside.
Not being able to be myself completely was not fulfilling anymore. I had this strong feeling inside that there was more to life. The imaginary worlds I created and the stages I was on weren’t fueling me as much anymore. My real life surroundings started feeling very misaligned. It was like I had played so many different characters throughout my life that I didn’t know who I really was.
At 21 years old, my best friend was living in New York City at the time and invited me up.
Upon getting off of the plane, and riding my first subway ride, my whole perception of life was rocked.
For the first time in my life, the real world around me was vivid, colorful and alive.
For the first time in my life, I was excited to explore and uncover what was actually around me. There were people of all ages, colors, heights, weights, occupations. So many different life stories, all traveling the same streets.
It felt alive – music, cars, chatter, singing, parks, lights.
New York City gave us 21 year olds a freedom that I hadn’t felt before. The freedom to roam freely and then to catch a subway whenever and wherever. It felt like a shell was cracking around me – wings on my back that I didn’t know existed start to appear.
For the first time in my life, I truly felt free.
I wanted to feel this feeling again.
I didn’t necessarily have a plan, but I knew I just needed to go out into the world and explore, high and low, until I felt it – my heart would know.
I had felt what it felt like to feel ALIVE and I refused to stay tied to a place or a life where my wings felt clipped.
Thankfully, I met a man who felt the same exact way. So, hand in hand, we ran towards that dream, searching the world for that feeling of feeling alive.
Chasing The Feeling Of Feeling ALIVE
I graduated college and was working as a nurse at the time, in Brain Injury and Spinal Cord. Between our two jobs, we would line up as much time as we could to explore. We would take advantage of each pocket of time off to go somewhere new and far.
Our focus became honing in on those activities or things that brought us joy and choosing places based on that. We would take notes of what we liked, of what stuck out to us.
We arrived at each place with the intention of learning and growing. We wanted to absorb the culture, the people and the places we were in as much as possible.
Although today it’s easy to say that we find the most joy exploring in the outdoors, we didn’t always know this.
We had traveled quite bit together at this point, mostly traveling between major cities. We had experienced Oktoberfest in Munich and St. Patrick’s Day in Dublin. We picnicked under the Eiffel Tower, drove the Ring Road in Iceland, and even saw the Queen herself in London.
As we continued visiting major cities, we started realizing that it wasn’t filling our cup as much. Each city started feeling the same. A desire to get deeper into each place began growing inside us.
It was in California where we were presented a glimpse of what “getting deeper” into a place looked like.
We were in the Redwoods National Forest, walking along the paved path, when a group passed by us. Each person in the group was oozing light and happiness from every pore. They each were suited up with large backpacks and were all wearing hiking shoes. They were hiking past the park to reach their sleeping spot for the night – somewhere deep in the forest.
As we stood there in jeans and chucks, we knew what our next challenge was. We were going to make our next trip “outdoorsy”.
Neither of us had grown up “outdoorsy”.
We both grew up in the city – cities that were not near the great outdoors. We had very limited knowledge on what being “outdoorsy” meant.
But, the joy of the group was so infectious that we knew we had to buy some gear and just rip the bandaid. We were committed to learning as we went.
I bought a proper jacket and assembled as much “outdoorsy” clothing that I had. We then both went to REI and bought some hiking boots.
We packed our bags from our high rise in the big city and headed to Colorado for 10 days.
When I say this trip changed our lives, it really changed our lives – more than we expected.
That feeling of freedom, of feeling alive that I felt in New York, was amplified in Colorado – by a million percent.
The colors seemed more vivid, the food seemed richer, the people seemed brighter.
After that trip, we knew we were on to something. We were now on a mission to find all of those places that made us feel that way around the world, and eventually move to one.
For the next 3 years, we prioritized getting deeper into the outdoors, in different parts of the world.
Being a nurse is one of the most emotionally and physically taxing jobs that truly does not get enough pay nor credit. My body was starting to take on the stress, finally bubbling over into full body stress hives, extreme inflammation and endless restless nights.
I found healing being in the outdoors. Like my body was put to rest and I could simply breathe. With each trip, we started taking note of what quality of life meant for people around the world. Was all of this stress, so early in my career something that was going to lead to a long, healthy life?
We followed Colorado with California (in a more “outdoorsy” way this time) and then Arizona. We then stayed in Western Europe, where we spent months on end exploring. From Italy to the Nordics and everything in between. We went winter skiing in the Alps, and spent long summers in the Rivieras.
We spent a month and a half in New Zealand.
It was in New Zealand where my husband and I both decided that something needed to change.
Having been exposed to and studying what true quality of life was, learning about wellness and longevity, about the importance of nurturing both the mind and the body, we couldn’t ignore the reality. My body was already screaming at us at the top of its lungs, and being so far removed from the everyday made it even more obvious that this was just not a way to live.
Were we really going to let a job take away from my actual life?
So, from our campervan in Queenstown, New Zealand, on my 5th year as a nurse, I put in my 2 weeks. We immediately got out of the van, ran to the side of the road and screamed with joy!
Prioritizing our life and our story has been the best decision we’ve ever made.
We then continued traveling throughout Europe- we rented a campervan in Iceland for a few weeks, spent an extended time in Austria (one of our favorite countries), roadtripped Normandy, France, and car-camped throughout the Norwegian Fjords.
During this time of travel, we made our first big move to a small mountain town. This town was just a few hours from family. With our extensive travel, though, we calculated having been abroad more than in our home.
So, after 2 years, we decided to pack everything up, put all of our belongings in storage, and live on the road full time.
We then lived out of Colorado for some months to bounce back and forth while the Schengen visa would reset.
The beautiful people we met, the foods that we ate, the languages we began learning. The cultures we immersed ourselves in, the concerts and symphonies that we attended. All of the museums that we spent hours roaming in, the traditions and the customs.
Each location expanded our minds and changed our perspectives in monumental ways.
This exciting 3 year stint took a pause on our last 3 month stay in Europe.
The 8 Months That Shaped Me
My husband was hit with a sudden lay off (tech in America…). No severance, no real explanation, just worked him like a horse for the month prior and then tossed him aside.
The next several months were very hard.
Completely shaken up, we decided to stay in Europe and finish what we originally planned, just with a little less play money. Since we had already paid for our stays and rental cars before the trip, we were just going to have to pay for food and small things that you would have to pay for anywhere, might as well do that in Norway.
So, we spent our last 2 weeks car- camping through the Norwegian Fjords, pondering what our next move was going to be.
We then flew back to the US, spent 2 weeks with family in New York and then back to the place that pushed us to seek more to begin with.
It was like two opposite ends were pulling me – gratitude for my in- laws allowing us a warm place to stay and food on the table, and on the other end complete depletion and emptiness. There was nothing left inside of me.
Being back in the place we found no alignment in, after feeling so much freedom, we couldn’t even pretend to have energy. We were in a very low place.
While on the road, we spent a lot of time developing who we were as individuals and as a couple. Having to deal with this low was also teaching us a whole lot about ourselves.
The more we were learning about ourselves, the more we realized why the place we called ‘home’ for so long felt like everything but that. We started realizing that our values and our perspectives did not align with the way of life of that environment, making it impossible to find any sort of flow.
We occupied a lot of our time trying to keep busy. We focused on continuing to learn and keeping our brains sharp. We would ride our bikes or go out on walks as much as we could. We tried to make the best of our time with my in- laws, planning some field trips on certain days, or cooking a nice dinner at home while we listened to Bossa Nova.
Constantly being in survival mode, though, takes a toll on you.
Having to defend yourself and what you know to be true about yourself and what you want for your future, over and over again, is very hard. But it allowed us to grow within ourselves and as a couple.
There were so many valuable lessons learned during that time that are very necessary to learn in life – just not easy to go through.
One of the biggest lessons I learned was the importance of unapologetically putting myself and my husband first, and setting boundaries with those around us.
Experiencing a low period in life brings out people’s true colors. Unfortunately, for us, that meant seeing sides of people around us that we never expected to see.
Although there some amazing souls around us that helped bring us light during this time, the bad apples are the ones who ruin it for all.
Selfishness, greed, jealousy, drama, small- mindedness.
If you’re not in a fruitful environment for you, your light will dim and eventually your flame will burn out completely. No one can pour anything from an empty cup and, with each day that would pass, our cups felt more empty.
It was very lonely and disappointing in many ways. Each day, I had to force a smile and try to find silver linings, but as the time went on, it proved to be harder and harder.
We continued to hold onto each other – a little tighter each day.
We held onto the thought of how much stronger this was going to make us, how exciting our future was going to be.
We never stopped dreaming, no matter how many times we were told that we had to “start living real life”. We knew that this was our “real life”, and that was all that mattered.
Finally, after 8 months of darkness, a light became visible once again.
The day my husband accepted the offer for his new role, a huge weight lifted off of our shoulders. It felt like I could fully breathe again for the first time in a very long time. I felt my wings starting to stretch again.
I will never forget the long hug we shared the day everything was finalized, releasing so many emotions and silently holding each other so tight. Like our bodies melted together again, like we were charging each other’s batteries again.
We made it to the end. We were stronger than ever, more grounded, and more connected as husband and wife than ever before.
Once again, we tightly held each other’s hands and began running towards our dream. With all of the lessons learned and held dearly from this time, we were ready to begin our next chapter in life.
We packed our belongings, loaded up the boxes in a POD and moved to the Mountain West, where we currently live.
Why I Started This Blog
Since childhood, I have kept a journal.
In these journals, I have detailed lessons, observations, emotions, places, goals, dreams, ideas. I have written down favorite restaurants, tips from travel, sayings and quotes. I have long lists of favorite books and have picked up on recipes and techniques in the kitchen (food really does taste better when it looks pretty).
I have also used journaling as a way to sort out my thoughts, to create a listener for myself in my most lonely times.
There are so many lessons that I learned from being on the road – about different cultures, about life, about the importance of getting to know yourself and loving yourself, about the feeling of freedom in one’s own life.
During low times, sometimes the biggest lessons are learned. Those 8 months allowed me to learn lessons that I wish I could have learned sooner. During that time, I promised myself that I would put these lessons into writing so that whoever needed to read it, can hopefully find it sooner than I did.
My passion for storytelling has always driven me to document my journey. From the vivid tales of my imagination to the real-life adventures I embark on. From the simple moments of taking in a sunset with my husband, to retelling stories from places far and wide – telling every detail, every feeling, every color, every taste.
I hope to create a trail of thoughts, ideas and stories to live long past my life – so my great great great great grandkids can read about who my husband and I were, what life was like in this time and see life as I see it now.
This may be quite far- fetched for a simple blog, but the biggest thing I learned during those 8 months was that life is too beautiful to waste. Life is meant to be fully and completely lived. Every single second of it.
I’ve never been one to do what everyone else was doing. I live my life the way that feels good inside. I surround myself with the people that make me feel good inside. There’s just no time to waste on anything that doesn’t make us feel our best (I’ve wasted enough time on that already).
I created this blog as a place where I can share my story. A place where I can create conversation around all the different facets of being human- the human experience and about the simple pleasures in life.
Share the lessons I’ve learned from both the highs and the lows with those that need to hear it. Share my observations and perspectives and hear others’. Share advice I’ve learned along the way, tips on things I have spent time digging into, and just simply share in things I love to learn about – quality of life, music, books, being outside, biking, wellness, food, and culture.
I am fascinated by this beautiful world we all live in. I wish to share this fascination with anyone who will listen.
So, thank you for being here – thank you for reading – and I am excited to see what this new adventure will bring 🙂
Until next time,
Cristina Marie