So, a couple of months ago, I started a new Instagram account from 0, didn’t tell anyone I knew, and just started posting whatever felt right and inspiring to me, in hopes of connecting with people that resonated with what I had to share.
What a humbling experience it has been.
Although starting something from scratch is not new to me, it is never any easier to go through the initial growing pains.
Having jumped schools a bit growing up, I got very accustomed to starting fresh in a new environment. I learned to love having a clean slate everywhere I went to be whoever I wanted to be.
As I got older, and began traveling more, I realized that I liked changing things up constantly, I didn’t like to ever feel stuck doing the same thing over and over again.
This included environment, people, and even hobbies.
In 2020, my husband and I both completely deleted social media, and for the following 5 years focused on finding ourselves, on growth and on coming up with the plan for our future – with zero input from anyone or anything.
The breaking point for deleting our socials was the overwhelming media consumption of 2020, which fueled a strong desire to reclaim our lives from its grip.
It was the best and most defining time in my life.
That time off any social media revealed my true aspirations, the person I wanted to become, and, crucially, who my genuine supporters were – and weren’t.
Many lessons were learned, clarity was improved and boundaries were set that ultimately defined so much of who I am today.
Once international flights started back up in 2021, my husband and I took the opportunity to travel as much as we could. Our goal was to find aspects of different cultures around the world that could fuel growth and give us wider perspectives for our own lives and the future forward.
For months at a time, we would jump from skiing in Kitzbühel, Austria to car camping in the West Fjords of Norway. We rented a van and traveled throughout South Island in New Zealand and rode bikes all throughout Scandinavia.
Eventually, we realized that we spent more time abroad than we did in our apartment so we packed up our things, put them in storage and committed to living full time on the road.
This lifestyle was spontaneous, fun, exciting, eye- opening. We met so many people, saw so many new places, tried so many new foods and activities. Our minds were growing, our perspectives were changing, and our connection to each other was growing stronger and stronger.
But there’s no denying that jumping from one place to the next doesn’t allow for deep relationships to be made with others – especially with no social media.
Some great experiences shared with people had little to no follow- up since we lacked a way of staying connected.
This was fine at the time since we were moving so fast, but now that we’re a more settled in Salt Lake City, it feels right to get back on social media and seek community.
I knew I didn’t just want to start back my old profiles and add everyone I knew before we lived on the road as if nothing had changed. That felt like I was simply picking up where I left off, when in reality, the woman I am today is nothing like the woman who left her hometown years prior.
I want my new social media profiles, and my voice, to represent who I am today.
So, I started completely new and didn’t tell anyone that I know. It feels a bit like a social experiment. I’m just putting my story out there, the things that bring me joy, and hoping that the right people will find it.
I feel confident in that. I love making short videos, or “little movies”, of everyday moments and trying to capture the emotions and the feelings of that moment. I like to relive our small adventures or just capture moments of raw connection between my husband and I to encapsulate who we are in this very moment.
Photography has always been an extension of my voice. You would always find a camera in my hand growing up. I love taking glimpses of every moment in its rawest form and creating a story with them.
I would love to show these videos and these pictures to our kids one day to give them a glimpse into our lives at this very moment.
I put a lot of time on my posts (too much time sometimes) – making a reel or curating the photos to put up. I find a lot of passion in creating videos or taking pictures that capture a moment in my life.
I’d be lying if I said that sometimes tt feels like a huge waste of time and quite frankly, a bit embarrassing. Not adding anyone I know creates a space where no one has a true investment in what I’m putting up because they don’t know me resulting in very minimal reach at this moment.
But I’ve learned to keep my focus on the ‘why’.
At first, I had no ‘why’. I felt like if the world was going to take me seriously, that I would need to have a big following. So I started looking up tips and tricks and tried posting like the big accounts, essentially skipping over the ‘why’ and focusing solely on trying to hack my way into a big following.
This quickly proved to be very stressful and felt very inauthentic.
It created this internal conflict of knowing that I ‘had’ to post content, but not feeling genuine or understanding the reasoning behind posting my life out into the world everyday.
This internal conflict caused a 4 month hiatus off of social media yet again.
We went on a ski holiday in Jackson, Wyoming in January of this year, and I had an epiphany. I realized that the reason behind this Instagram account was actually much bigger than simply posting to try and get followers.
The ‘why’ is a strong desire to create my identity in this world, and ultimately send a bat call to those who resonate with what I put out.
Building out this new Instagram is my way of presenting myself to this world in a raw and authentic way. Each video or photo that I post is simply me showing aspects of myself and seeing who it resonates with, ultimately leading to building community and meeting like- minded people.
No stress about likes or comments or follows. Just being me, authentically, and seeing what opportunities open up from there.
So, for now, I just need to push through the awkward start of it and keep focused on my ‘why’.
I trust that what will follow will be really beautiful.
Thank you for joining me on this journey, and I’m so excited to see where it takes me.
I would love to connect with you on IG – send me a message and I’ll be sure to respond 🙂
As always, sending you lots of love <3
Until next time,
Cristina Marie
